DARK KNIGHT

*****

Reporter: We here there's no blood in the corpses. Is that true?
Nick: Inquiring minds want to know.
Reporter: Knight, you're stonewalling. Knight!
Nick: *Go home.*
Reporter: Yeah...sure...I think I'll go home now.

Officer Detrick: We got zip, but check this out--the doors were locked, but the alarm was still on. He had to fly here.
Nick: Or he was here already. (Nick comes up to a statue with a prominent cross.)
Detrick: What's wrong, Nick?
Nick: Nothing, ah, just these old museums give me the jeebees.
Detrick: I hear ya, brother.

Nick: How long's Schanke been here?
Detrick: I'd say about ten minutes. How'd you know?
Nick: I can smell his cologne.

Schanke: Gimme this thing. Gimme this thing. Ya gotta get real low, right up the honker. Nice low angle like this...bing, bang, boom, bing, bang, work with me..work with me. Like that. Don't be afraid, it's just a dead body. Hey Wonder Boy, what kept ya?
Nick: I thought you were working old town tonight, Schanke?
Schanke: I thought you might need some experienced help.
Nick: And your experience tells you we should be looking at nasal hairs?

Schanke: Can you believe they put a guy like this in homicide? He falls apart when he sees a little salsa picante.

Nick: These are from Altun Kinal, aren't they?
Dr. Alyce Hunter: How would you know that?
Nick: The green in the pigmentes. And the glyphs of Shockmore(sp?). Did you know, the really scary thing is, the first four digits up there match my alarm code.
Alyce: You can read it.
Nick: Ah, I've done a little amateur grave-robbing in my time.
Alyce: We were going to announce that no one's excavated that site in a hundred years.
Nick: The curse.
Alyce: Not many amateurs know about that.
Nick: The jade cup, the one that was stolen from the case, was that from Kinal?
Alyce: It was used in sacrifice ceremonies. We unearthed it last month.
Nick: Do you have a drawing?
Alyce: It was extremely rare. Maybe the only one of it's type in existence.
Nick: Do you know what that cup was used for?
Alyce: Yes, of course.
Nick: It was a practice unique to the area.
Alyce: It was used to drink the sacrificed victim's blood.

Natalie: Here, drink this.
Nick: What is it?
Natalie: Grasshopper buns, eye of newt, what the hell do you care? Drink it.
(Nick takes a sip and goes for the sink.)
Natalie: Have you ever noticed how you can take a simple thing like, oh, say, drinking tea, and turn it into this gigantic theatrical production?
Nick: Oh yeah, sure, that's easy enough for you to say.
Natalie: Come on.
(Nick takes a *tiny* sip.)
Natalie: Good boy.
Nick: Well, that's enough for today.
Natalie: I'm trying to help you, it's good for you.
Nick: I don't see you drinking any.
Natalie: How's your tan coming?
Nick: Well, I'm up to about ten minutes on the sunbed.
Natalie: Oh, a regular George Hamilton.
Nick: Are we dissecting me here, or the corpse?

Natalie: These are the only points of entry. Wounds of this size are not consistent with this amount of blood that he lost. Two neat little holes. Nick, is this something that I should worry about?

Stonetree: Look, I've been doing you a lot of favors. You're telling me you're allergic to sunlight, so I put you on the nightshift. Then you want to work alone. My instincts are kicking me in the face, but I say, why not, let him work alone. But, I am not going to stop this investigation when the sun comes up.
Nick: Who's he going to be, Captain?
Stonetree: Well, he's a day guy.
Nick: Who?
Stonetree: You'll like him. He's got a different experience.
Nick: His name.
Stonetree: You'll only have to work with him on the shift change.
Nick: Aw, come on, Captain.
Schanke: Well howdy, partner.
Nick: Will somebody shoot me...? Please?

LaCroix: Mortals...die. Does it really matter how or when?

Answering machine message: Hello Mr. Nick Knight. You have been selected by a major market research company to spend a sun-filled week in beautiful Hawaii. All you have to do to win-

Natalie: (On answering machine.) Hi, it's Nat. Have you checked yourself in the mirror? Is it working? Now, you're favorite medical examiner wants you to eat something this evening, understand? Cold turkey on the hemoglobin. Eat anything, anything you want. I'm sure you have something yummy at home. And don't worry, you won't be graded on your table manners. If you're a good boy, I might even let you take me out to dinner sometime. Tell me you understand....

Schanke (after chomping on some garlic): Hey watch this, watch this, watch this. Hey, hey, partner, partner. How are ya?

Schanke: What's the matter, my breath still bothering you? I'll smoke a ciggy.
Nick: Not in my caddy.
Schanke: You know, why don't you drive a nice clean city car, huh? A regular beater. I mean, we all know you're 'Joe Cool' but I think that-
Nick: Trunk space.
Schanke: Truck space?
Nick: Mmmm. The 1962 Cadillac has more trunk space than any other car made in the last thirty years.
Schanke: Trunk space. I knew that. It's probably better for me anyway. My wife has tried fifty thousand times to get me to quit-- nag, nag, nag. It's tough. It's an addiction, you know? Addictions are hard to give up.
Nick: Tell me about it.

Schanke: Take it from one who's been there, Kolchak. In-tu- ition. You're not going to solve this thing by the book. You've got to follow your instincts.

Schanke: What the hell are you doing?!
Nick: Three words Schanke. In-tu-ition.

Schanke: It's just a little plasma, Knight. Don't get worked up about it.

Nick: Back wall near the window. He's got the girl in front of him.
Schanke: You can see in there?
Nick: Try to get him to talk. I'll go around.
Schanke: Around? What the hell's around?

Schanke: A vampire. That's what he said.
Stonetree: No kidding.
Schanke: I heard him. A vampire swooped out of the sky and knocked him out. That's what he said.
Stonetree: Amazing.
Schanke: Of course, the perp had been smoking crack for seventy-two hours.
Stonetree: But you saw Knight pull the perpetrator out the window, right?
Schanke: Well yeah, Captain, I did.
Stonetree: And you weren't on crack?
Schanke: Me? No. I had a souvlaki with onions but, no crack.
Stonetree: You ever been bit by a scorpion?
Schanke: No, they're poisoness. I've seen them on the TV, but...they're scary things. No.
Stonetree: A lot of them are deadly. Where I used to live, they were all over the place. There's a legend. If you ever catch a scorpion, don't ever burn it.
Schanke: Why, they smell bad when they're fried?
Stonetree: If you burn it, the scorpions come from miles around to where you are, and....
Schanke: Don't tell me, don't tell me, don't tell me. You get all covered with scorpions, right? Is that true?
Stonetree: No. It's just a legend, like vampires.

Nick: By the way, these tacits don't fit the breast plate. The guy couldn't relieve himself.
Alyce: I'll tell the curator.
Nick: Ah, don't bother, no one can tell the difference.
Alyce: You can.
Nick: Happens to you once, you don't forget.

Alyce: They say that everything in our future can be found in our past. Nick: 'The past is the only dead thing that smells sweet.' Edward Thomson.
Alyce: Do you feel that way too?
Nick: No. It's too easy a place to hide.
Alyce: Is that what you think I'm doing?
Nick: Oh, come on, aren't you? Burying your head into old books, artifacts. Digging in dusty soil? Working alone here, at night?
Alyce: I like the night.
Nick: No people, no present, just the past?
Alyce: I'm comfortable with it.
Nick: Don't be. Dwell on yesterday, and you have no today, and no tomorrow.
Alyce: Another quote?
Nick: No, the voice of experience.
Alyce: You haven't lived that long.
Nick: I'm workin' on it.

Schanke: Yeah, I figured he would come back here, so I drove the Caddy.
Natalie: Do you still have the keys?
Schanke: You know, I forgot the way those things used to ride. You're talking smooth. A rolling condominium. Think you can find him?
Natalie: What time's sunrise?
Schanke: Five thirty-six. What's that got to do with anything?

Natalie: You know, you create a lot of tension when you disappear like this. Stonetree starts eating kleenex. Have you ever seen him do that? I think he does it for the roughage.

Natalie: Is this the same guy who came begging to me to help him change so he could see a sunrise?
Nick: Screw the sunrise. Give me the bottle!
Natalie: No! Look, everything I do for you, everything that can help you regain your mortality is wasted when you drink this stuff. It is the blood that keeps you from coming over.
Nick: I am what I am, and I don't think Betty Ford takes vampires.
Natalie: You can be human.
Nick: Human? What's more human--to drink a little cow blood now and then, or commit cold-blooded murder?
Natalie: You've done both.
Nick: I caught a killer tonight, I'm paying my debt.
Natalie: Oh, and you couldn't have caught him without the vampire?
Nick: Who cares how I did it?
Natalie: You do.

Natalie: What happened last night?
Nick: I kissed her.
Natalie: And?
Nick: And then I nearly killed her.

Natalie: Nick, don't you think it's time you talked about the others?

Natalie: So, it was this LaCroix who was killing the indians at Altun Kinal?
Nick: He didn't want me to have the other cup. He didn't then, he doesn't now. LaCroix was my master, the vampire who brought me over. It's hard to explain. He's like a father, or a brother, but he'll do anything to keep me this way.
Natalie: Including killing a guard and steeling it from the museum.
Nick: The skylight was the only way in, I did it last night. It's him.
Natalie: And he believes that if you perform this ceremony, you can become mortal again?
Nick: We both do.

Natalie: What about the street people? I mean, he killed the guard at the museum to get the cup, the indians to halt the dig, but that still doesn't explain why he'd be killing these homeless people.
Nick: They were always our prey. I mean nobody cares about them. Nobody notices them when they're gone. It never bothered LaCroix. Only me. This is his way of getting back at me. This is his way of calling me out, Nat.

Schanke: What is his problem?
Natalie: I don't think you want to know.

Janette: The night's dark, I am the owner, and I find I am able to mix it with a little wine. My bartender thinks I am lush. Would you like some?
Nick: No.
Janette: Oh, that's right, yes. You are probably on duty.
Nick: He's here.
Janette: I know so many people. What is your name this time, hmm? Nicky something?
Nick: I want to know where he is, Janette.
Janette: He hasn't been making these kills, if that's what you think. Nowadays nobody is that stupid.
Nick: Where is he?!

Janette: Filthy habit. Hmm. At least I know it can't kill me.

Janette: I'd be careful if I were you. He's very disappointed.

Nightcrawler: The Nightcrawler bringing you a little lead on CERK metal for the ages. Three weeks in this town, and I still haven't seen my old friend. This next song is dedicated to you, Nicholas, my brother, my child.

Nightcrawler: The Nightcrawler's waiting for you....